Men Interrupted 2: Yami no Matsuei Style
by Jigoku Hikari
Summary: The phone's ringing, the pager's going off, Watari's jumping through windows… Another couple that just can't get any privacy. MurTsu Oneshot.


**Summary: **The phone's ringing, the pager's going off, Watari's jumping through windows… Another couple that just can't get any privacy. (Mur/Tsu) One-shot.

**Rated M **due to sexual references/preferences, crude humor, and slight language

**Word Count:** 1,904

**Disclaimer:** All characters used belong to Matsushita-sama, Viz, Hakusensha, and whomever else I don't know about.

**Men Interrupted 2: Yami no Matsuei Style**

The sheets beneath them rustled as they moved to be more comfortable. The faint sound of passionate, heat-filled kissing and hands traveling over bare skin could be heard from the bed.

"Mmph…"

…..

Even though it was a brightly lit early summer day, the bedroom inside a second story apartment was dark. The window was open like the rest, but the blinds and curtains were closed. The only light that could come in was when a breeze swept by and was able to hit the carpet.

Lips detached to end the kiss, coming down to lick at a certain shinigami's neck. Hands ventured further, slowly getting rid of the last articles of clothing between them.

…..

"Ahh…"

…..

"Kazu…"

"_Patience_, my Asato…"

…..

"Don't stop…"

A smooth voice chuckled as he discarded the other's last piece of clothing.

…..

The shrill screams of the phone in the living room broke the content silence. Both men groaned in annoyance, Dr. Muraki's head falling to Tsuzuki's shoulder. "_Great_…"

Tsuzuki pushed on the blonde that was sitting between his thighs as the phone rang again. "Go get it…" he said softly.

Muraki raised himself up, both eyes lustful as his right hand trailed down Tsuzuki's body. "They can call back later…"

Amethyst eyes winced as the hand reached its destination. "_No_," he said, knocking Muraki's hand away, "Go get the phone."

Giving an agitated sigh at having his fun interrupted, Muraki got up and off the bed. "All right. I'll be back in a moment." He stopped in the doorway and looked back at his lover. "No moving…"

The pale skinned doctor, clad only in light grey boxers, crossed the living room and picked the phone up to stop it's screaming. "Hello?"

"_Hello_," said a cool, male voice on the other end. "I'm calling to take a poll. I was wondering if you would vote to pass a law that would make all military women wear tiny mini skirts?"

Muraki blinked. "Weirdo." He slammed the phone down and headed back to the bedroom- and his awaiting Tsuzuki.

He stopped in the doorway, staring at his favorite brunette. Like he'd expected, Tsuzuki hadn't moved an inch since he left. A smirk found a way onto his lips as he approached the bed. "Back to where we _were_…" he said smoothly.

Tsuzuki put his arms around the doctor as his left ear was licked and nipped at. "Who was on the phone?"

"Some guy taking a stupid poll. But never mind _that_…"

"Mm-…"

…..

"Ah…. Nn…"

…..

"Hey- No _cheating_, Asato…"

…..

"We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas-"

Both attentions went to the window the singing was coming from, hands automatically stopping what they were doing. "What the-?" escaped from Muraki as he went to get up again.

"-We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!-"

Muraki tossed aside the right curtain and jerked the blinds open to see what had interrupted him this time. He glared down at the group of seven young adults, both males and females, caroling right below the window. Their backs were toward him, and they seemed to be singing for absolutely no reason.

"- Oh bring us some Figgie pudding, oh bring us some Figgie pudding and bring-!"

"Shut **up** down there!" Muraki yelled, sticking his head out the window. "It's the middle of **June!**"

All seven carolers turned their heads to glare darkly at the blonde.

"Go sing somewhere else! We **don't** want to _hear_ that!" he continued yelling, glaring right back.

Mumbling amongst themselves and still shooting dirty glances at Muraki, (the females continuously looking back at him) they walked down the street to go somewhere else.

The doctor fully stood, slamming the window shut and re-closing the blinds. "There," he sighed, fixing the curtains to block out all light, "Peace and quiet again." He turned to stare at the brunette waiting for him on the bed, able to see his seductive smile. "_Now_," Muraki said barely above a whisper, slowly going to Tsuzuki, "to finish what I _started_…"

"About time…" the shinigami mumbled before having his lips taken over.

"_**Mmm**_…"

_**BEEP BEEP BEEP-!**_

Muraki stopped in his tracks, his knee on the edge of the bed from where he was about to get back on top of Tsuzuki. "You've got to be _kidding_ me…"

_**BEEP BEEP BEEP-!**_

Tsuzuki grinned at how annoyed his aggressor was becoming. "Go see who's _beeping_ you, Muraki," he said, sounding thoroughly amused, "You can even _call_ them. I can _wait_…"

_**BEEP BEEP BEEP-!**_

The blonde shot a glare at him as he went to walk to the living room again. "Well I'm starting to not be able to." He stormed out of the room.

The pager was sitting on the circular coffee table by the couch. A tiny red light above the screen that was showing the number of who paged him was flashing every time it beeped. Muraki hurriedly picked up the small electronic object up and, without even looking at the phone number on the screen, chucked it as hard as he could out the open window. "Stupid thing…" he mumbled, "Never should've gotten one…"

_**BEEP BEEP-!**_

**"OWW!"**

He heard a body hit the ground below. Rushing to the window, he guessed what had happened. The pager itself was now a million pieces, and a person was lying crumpled on the sidewalk. He could only guess- he didn't have his glasses on, it was far away, and all he could see was a brown blob in the shape of a human, and the silence said what had become of the pager. Shrugging it off, he went back to the bedroom, the apartment quiet once more.

Tsuzuki had his arms and legs crossed, staring at Muraki expectantly. "_Well_? Who paged you?"

Muraki stopped in the doorway again. The only light that was coming was from the living room, dimly showing the shinigami's nude body. "I forget…" he said quietly. His eyes landed on the teasing smirk, which only made him want the brunette even more. He took a few steps to come to the edge of the bed…

_**KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK!**_

The blonde growled as Tsuzuki laughed. "Please don't kill him!" he called after Muraki, who had already stomped out of the room.

"Oh, _**I**_ won't kill him…" Muraki mumbled evilly as he went for his snowy white trench coat instead of the door.

_**KNOCK-KNOCK!**_

"Coming!" the doctor called irritably, hiding what he'd gotten from his coat behind his wrist. He didn't even care about hiding his very apparently naked regions as he opened the front door.

He didn't bother to at least see who it was before stabbing the innocent person in the neck with a loaded syringe. He instantly pressed the liquid into the jugular. The small body fell to the ground, vibrant emerald eyes closing.

Silver and blue looked down at the teenage body now at his feet. Blonde hair, those eyes were so _very_ familiar…

"**HA!**" he grinned maliciously. "You can't walk in and spoil my fun THIS time you little **BRAT!**"

"**HISOKA?!**"

Muraki whirled around to see Tsuzuki standing there, staring horrified at his partner's unconscious body. "Tsuzuki, wait-"

Tsuzuki charged at Muraki. "You killed him! I told you to **not** kill whoever was at the door!"

The doctor caught the shinigami, slinging him over his shoulder like he was a weightless doll. "He's _fine_, Asato," he said, clearly irritated as he kicked the door shut. "It was only a _tranquilizer_, I _swear_ to you-"

"Well, _sorry_ for not believing you!" Tsuzuki yelled. "You never _did_ like Hisoka, and you're getting more and more pissed off 'cause you can't-!"

The phone's loud wails cut him off, automatically making him stop in mid-sentence. Muraki, still with his naked lover over his shoulder, strolled over to the phone, picked it up and threw it out the same window the pager had gone through.

**…**

"**WHOEVER KEEPS THROWING JUNK AT ME OWES ME LOTS OF MONEY FOR HEAD INJURIES!**"

Tsuzuki's head perked up, trying to look down through the window. "**Tatsumi?!**" he said as Muraki went as fast as he could back to the bedroom.

The brunette was thrown onto the bed, landing where he had been lying before. The bedroom door was shut and locked. The window was locked as well. Panting somewhat, Muraki crawled on top of Tsuzuki, his eyes wide from being crazed and trying to see in the near complete darkness.

Tsuzuki put his right hand on the doctor's cheek. "Calm down, Kazu…" he said soothingly. "I'm sure you have me _all_ to yourself now…" His hand slid up through silky platinum blonde hair to bring his head down.

"I better…" Muraki mumbled, relaxing as arms went around him to pull him into a kiss.

…..

"… Uhn…"

…..

"Ah-…

…..

"Mmph!"

"Heh heh… What's the _matter_, Kazutaka?"

"Shut up."

…..

"Uh-!"

_Squeak_…

"_Shhh…_"

_Squeak squeak squeak…_

"Nnn-!"

_**CRASH!**_

Both wide-eyed, horrified expressions went to the now broken window. The sunlight, now able to get into the room because of the broken blinds and moving curtains due to wind, revealed a man that had landed on his left knee. His curly blonde hair was tied up in a high ponytail, dark sunglasses his eyes, and a white bandanna was tied to hide his face from the nose down. The lovers were still wide-eyed as the man stood, Tsuzuki even more so as he knew who it was.

"Tsuzuki!" said the unmistakable voice of Watari from under the bandanna. "I have come to save you from some ungodly evil that not even _you_ can defeat, and-! Wow, it's awfully _dark_ in here. Maybe if I just-"

The doctor and brown-haired shinigami were even more horrified to watch Watari take his sunglasses off to replace them with his normal glasses to see in the dark better.

"Ah! _**Much**_ better!" Watari said cheerfully. "Now…" He blinked, his eyes adjusting to the dim light. His sight landed on two very shocked faces, how naked they were, how they were _connected_…

"**AHH! My EYES!**" he yelled, covering said eyes. "**They BURN! They-!**" He took a step backward, his foot slipping on the blinds. Watari fell back out the way he came in. "**AHHHHH-oof!**….. Zero-zero-three! Quickly, fetch me an ambulance!"

Muraki's head fell to Tsuzuki's shoulder. "I give up…"

"You owe me for a new phone, a broken window, and Watari's medical bills," said Tsuzuki. "And… I'm sure you're _glad_ to be rid of that stupid pager."

The doctor got off Tsuzuki and sat on the edge of the bed, his back toward his lover. His elbows were on his knees, hands holding his head as he stared down at his discomfort, contemplating on what to do with it.

Arms came from behind and went around him, a hand going where he didn't want it going at that moment. "We can try one more time…" whispered Tsuzuki with the sexiest voice he could muster.

Muraki looked over at the broken window. "Not here, we're not."

"Who said it had to be in _here_?" Tsuzuki got to his feet and grabbed Muraki's hand. "Come on."

Muraki was pulled to his feet, having to wait to open the door before proceeding. He was led into the small bathroom of the apartment. Tsuzuki shut the door behind them.

"… It's cramped in here."

"Heh heh… You'll have to manage."

**END**

Written 3-29 to 4-1-06; edited 10/7/13


End file.
